The Witch of Dreiden (short story)

71

By Stories Inc.

on identity (revelation)

I’ve finally figured out what kind of writer I am and how to characterize my writing:

21st Century Romanticism or ‘Escapism ’, though not limited to that feature. And of course, a return to romanticism is not identical to the late 18th and 19th century version. It incorporates everything that came after and alongside it and merges into one whole. But there are a number of key interests incorporated in the term, such as focus on the darker sides of the human psyche, the unknown, return to the told and to folk literature (or sphere thereof), supernatural elements, nature, individualism, ... I quite like this term. Mind you, it is a broad category to which I for one include among others works such as Harry Potter, the Lord of the Rings-movies and even Twilight.

I’ve been ‘lost and wandering’ for a long time when it comes to my identity as a writer, if I have one. I started out as overly romantic, then tried to be something, anything else, losing my way and unable to make it back. Now I see I’ve returned and quite possible never really left to begin with. It feels a bit like coming home. Perhaps it’s sheer vanity – it does sound fancy, doesn’t it? – but this is what I feel good in. If I don’t deserve such a nice name yet, I’m just going to work harder to earn it.

I know this probably doesn’t make sense to a lot of you and to others is even of no interest at all, and maybe it is fairly irrelevant to anyone else. However, I just needed to vent this one way or the other or I would’ve burst. Everyone is free to just skip this and start reading though. This is just a small paragraph to indicate some sort of characterization, though my posts here are just the tip of the iceberg.

With ‘The Witch of Dreiden’, I tried a slightly different approach, going back to what I used to write, before I switched to I-narration and started posting here. I hope you like it. I’m quite proud of it, I loved writing it and I put a lot more effort into it than I did with my other stories, even making it a video. I’m always proud of what I wrote last, so I could change my mind fairly quickly.

Anyway, I hope it’s a good read. Let me know what you think in the comment section below.

All best wishes,

Stories Inc.

P.S.: I typed this very fast again, otherwise I’d never get to writing/posting it, so if you find any errors, which is most likely, let me know and I’ll fix them.

 

The Witch of Dreiden

She was never in a hurry, but always on the move. They’d see her darting across the streets of Dreiden. She does not linger and she never speaks. It made them wonder.

Dressed in an ankle-long moss green gown. Never was she seen in anything else, come rain or shine. As if she stepped out of a long forgotten fairytale and is not aware.

Her face hidden in the hood of a dim greyish cloak, held together with a pin in which those brave enough to go near her, mean to recognise the emblem of the Pagan Trinity.

From time to time, mostly at dusk, she was spotted bobbing through the village holding a bunch of white flowers, which later turned up somewhere in the graveyard, yet it was certain she had no ancestors among our dead.

No one had ever seen her eat, or drink, or sleep and not a soul knew where her house was. If she lived in one. A few believe she lives in a cave, like a dragon. All that could be said, was that she dwelled the woods. That was as far as they had managed to track her, before she disappeared.

Her name was unknown. Some said it was Mary, others called her Beth, at least one believed it to be Lilith. She would respond to either one with a complacent nod.

She was very beautiful, in a mystifying way, and of a disposition so dreamy, it was almost childlike. Chestnut brown hair she had, waist-long and thick as a carpet, and the deep, gleaming eyes of a wolf. She was rumoured able to see in the dark and reported running with packs. Several drifters went as far as to assert having seen her fly through the air.

Her smile was, to say the least, mysterious, her gaze hypnotic. It led young men of the village astray, luring them into the woods at night and into the swamps. Some say the witch had killed them. Their bodies were found occasionally, mutilated to such a degree that it was certain the witch had fed on them, our sons.

She is known to the oldest and wisest of the women, respectable and virtuous from the first to the last, as a bringer of catastrophes. Floods were her specialty.

Wanderers claim that at nights of the full moon, they can hear her voice resound through the forest, that she’d be singing. On such nights, she would bathe in the river, causing the water to rise. And surely, heavy rains would fall.

Whenever showers threatened to make the streams of the valley overflow, the old wives would bring baskets of bread, cake and honey to the edge of the forest, peace-making gifts for some offence on the part of the village.

No one was ever seen collecting them, but the next day, all would be emptied. Naturally, afterwards, the rain would stop.

It was a generally held notion among the elders that whomever spoke ill of her, would die in the course of a month – it was proven many times among their fellows – and so would those sacrilegers who dared hunt inside her woods. When scorned by an individual, a basket would no longer suffice to save the poor soul. She’d smite him with sickness and calamity.

Despite having never uttered a word, she was known to be fickle. She held the pass to the nearest city, the great Danbourg, and those who did not pay her toll, would return no more. Nor would some who did.

As to what she was exactly, opinions were divided. She was called a demon, a vampire, a succubus but the majority held her for a witch. It was often discussed at council meeting if they shouldn’t dispose of her – like had been done before in other towns –but in the end, they dared not. It was especially the question of her possible immortality that made the leaders afraid to push a decision that would incite her wrath against the village. All were anxious. Surely, she was one who lived untouched by time. If they failed to kill her, her vengeance would be eternal.

Never did her appearance alter. It was said, over pints in the cafe or muffled in church, that the fathers of grandfathers had claimed to have seen a strange young woman from the forest, even in their own time. The stories were passed on through the generations and were remembered clear as daylight. More culturally developed among us, swore to discern her silhouette in ancient paintings. She must not have aged a day. It could not possibly be otherwise.

Whatever she was, the girl was devilish.

Something had to be done. It was decided. For their children. The annual bonfire of San Marc was coming up. This year, they would personally invite her – for the first time in village history – and keep all foreigners at bay. Poke the flames up higher.

It was decided. They would never talk of it again.

Burn the Witch_soundtrack to The Witch of Dreiden

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Comments

Christopher Floyd profile image

Christopher Floyd 18 months ago

Fun and subtly eerie. I want more.

Stories Inc. profile image

Stories Inc. Hub Author 18 months ago

Good :) Glad you like it.

Mark Bronze profile image

Mark Bronze Level 4 Commenter 18 months ago

Good interesting story. Looking forward to more. Thank you.

Stories Inc. profile image

Stories Inc. Hub Author 18 months ago

Well, you're welcome and thank you for dropping by and taking the trouble to comment. I really appreciate it. If you want more, just stay tuned ;)

Aaron Trotter 18 months ago

Absolutely loved this, reminded me a little of when I watched, In the company of wolves recently had the same mystery. I also write (but not on my blog just yet) and very much find your style and predecessors of your style a big inspiration, hope to hear more of it...xx

Stories Inc. profile image

Stories Inc. Hub Author 18 months ago

Thrilled to hear it. I'll be keeping an eye on your blog (otherwise let me know when you start posting fiction) for your stories ;)

Thanks for dropping by and commenting

nighthag profile image

nighthag Level 4 Commenter 17 months ago

oh i think i am a fan!

I really enjoyed that, your flow of words was beautiful!!

Stories Inc. profile image

Stories Inc. Hub Author 17 months ago

Hello, nighthag!

I'm always glad to hear that, I loved your vampire piece :)

This one is really one of my favourites. I think if you liked this one, you'll definitely like the first part of a series I'm going to up today.

I've sort of been kind of neglecting hubs for a while and posted a lot more new stories on my other blog (www.storiesinc.blogspot.com), but a lot of them are just too short for hubs...

I'll post the longer ones soon.

See you around, nighthag!

loveofnight profile image

loveofnight Level 3 Commenter 16 months ago

I really like the way you put pen to paper, a real page turner....More More. ....

Stories Inc. profile image

Stories Inc. Hub Author 16 months ago

@loveofnight:

Thank you, I do my best :)

If you like this one, perhaps you'll like my latest short story series even better:

http://hubpages.com/hub/Notebook-a-tale-of-four-br

I hope you see some E.A.P. influences in this, he's kind of my literary hero, do I try to twist it my own way. ;)

tnderhrt23 profile image

tnderhrt23 Level 4 Commenter 16 months ago

ooooh! Stories! You had me from "hello" on this one! From the picture to the first sentence, yanked me right on in there! And left me hungry for more...

I am hesitant to offer criticism...please consider it constructive and positive, for I love this story, indeed. There is a bit of a tense issue in places...ei. "Her smile was, to say the least, mysterious, her gaze hypnotic. It lead young men of the village astray, luring them into the woods at night and into the swamps." Lead should be led or would lead. Then, later, you jump back into present tense..."She is known to the oldest and wisest of the women, respectable and virtuous from..." Otherwise, twere this a creative writing assignment,(witch it's not)((pun intended)) and twere I the instructor,(witch I'm not) this story would merit an A!

Stories Inc. profile image

Stories Inc. Hub Author 16 months ago

Hi tnderhrt,

don't worry, your criticism is much appreciated. It's this kind of feedback I need. I came here to improve my writing after all.

And I'm not a native speaker of English, so I do make mistakes now and then and luckily there are nice, devoted people like you who point it out, so I can do something about it.

But I did notice the change in tense, but at the time left that in because it added to the confusion and the blur. I might change my mind on that eventually.

If you notice any more irregularities in any of my hubs, please don't hesitate to tell me about it :)

An A, oh my, now I'm really happy. =D

tnderhrt23 profile image

tnderhrt23 Level 4 Commenter 16 months ago

I fear I am none but a "literary snob" at times, Stories...I even wrote a hub about it. Constructive criticism is how we hone our skills, but is not welcomed often, I'm afraid. I have an eye for detail, which landed me in Quality Assurance in the work force. It seems to be one thing I am good at, at times anyways. Tenses are a tricky thing in the English language, even for me and its my first and only language! lol...I am totally impressed by your abilities to write so creatively and so well in English! That transcends talent, in my book!

Stories Inc. profile image

Stories Inc. Hub Author 16 months ago

Thank you, tnderhrt23,

my English better be good, I studied it for 3-4 years on university level. =D And an eye for detail is a great thing to have. I tend to overlook quite a lot when I read over things I wrote, which doesn't help my case. And yes, I love English, but your tense system is horror for any student (or native speaker, LOL).

Maybe I'm just masochistic, but I really do appreciate constructive feedback, the harsher the better, cause that's the only way I'd ever learn. Otherwise, I'm just going to keep making the same mistakes over and over again and now that's something I really can't handle.

So, bombs away, wreck the whole thing if you like, than it will only be better once resurrected ;)

tnderhrt23 profile image

tnderhrt23 Level 4 Commenter 16 months ago

Stories, this is my final post here today...lol...Allow me to reassure you...There is absolutely NO NEED to bomb the Witch! She stands firm. Tense issues are gnats, where this story is concerned, in my humble opinion. It is a strong piece. As for your forum question about fantasy, I am an old geezerette...fantasy is not my norm, nor is Sci-Fi...BUT...I am an open minded geezerette who loves to try new things...so you can count me in! Ciao for now!

Stories Inc. profile image

Stories Inc. Hub Author 16 months ago

Tnderhrt, sorry, I was away for a bit.

Good to hear you feel so strongly about NOT burning the witch, LOL.

And I call the work fantasy, because it is, but I do very much hope it will hold appeal for all sorts of audiences with all kinds of preferences. And I'll be looking forward to hearing from you on it, thanks a lot for caring :)

Take care, tnderhrt, enjoy your holidays.

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